Martin Luther King, Jr.

Yesterday was emotionally exhausting. I'm always drained by the evening of the 3rd Monday in January.
Martin Luther King, Jr touches my heart.
The entire fight for Civil Rights is a subject I can barely talk about without getting all jumbled up on my insides. I struggle with the weight of the pain and restraint I feel in the fighters.

I want to stand strong with my fists clenched, ready to brawl.
I want to lay down and cover my head.
I want to intercede for the givers and receivers of hurt.
I want to scream and flail and make a fool of myself.
I want to hug everyone...
I don't want to offend, but I want to say I'm sorry.

So many I's. Maybe there needs to be more JESUS in there...

I don't know what to do, but I will keep seeking my part, and let Him have the rest.
Yesterday I packed out my van with kidlets (6 in all) and went to the only MLKJ event I could find in my area. We watched a video and read books and wrote poems and cried. I am so very impressed with my babies for wanting to learn, for wanting to understand.
God be glorified in our attempts.

On to the hum drum:
So, as a family we have been waiting since before Thanksgiving for a $3 an hour raise promised to us by Vicente's boss. "After the first of the year" he said.
The hope of it got us through a *very* difficult 5 weeks with little work, Christmas, and our baby boy's 9th birthday. Through it all we've repeated the mantra, "It's worth sticking it out with this company. It's worth sticking it out..."
Well, on Friday we learned that V's boss has changed his mind. No pay raise.
I won't say much about it because I might self-implode...we have made a few big decisions based on that promise, and it hurts to be lied to...

BUT! On to the fun of it:
We're looking for a new job for my Vicente!
We've considered the Oregon Youth Authority since before leaving Honduras, and it seems that may be where we're being led. It would be just perfect in so many ways. God's will be done!

Quick side note: My little battery icon on the laptop is telling me that it has 100% power!! I haven't a clue as to why it has decided to cooperate, but I ain't complaining! (I believe it has something to do with God knowing how much I can handle...but I won't make any claims.)