So I found a few pics that I love!

We have a cemetery right behind our neighborhood that everyone uses as a kind of park...I suppose it sounds disrespectful, written out like that, but it's not...trust me!
It was a freezing cold day, and I knew we were going to have to have more to keep us busy than just a nice jaunt through the graves. (Though that is a *great* way to pass the time, don't get me wrong...just not when it's a million below zero outside!)


So the kids and I bundled up:


Headed out for our adventure:


Found a foe to be beaten:


Assisted each other in the battle:


Conquered said foe:


And looked cute doing it:


I can't pretend to be even remotely humble about how insanely adorable my babies are. ;~D

I got's me a new computer!!!!!!!!!

Woohoo, yeehaw, and hip hip HOOray!
I'm back on line!!! :~D

I'd love to post a pic of my stylin new laptop...but I can't figure out how to upload only the *new* pictures from the camera. (Turns out I've taken 362 pictures since our 10 year anniversary last September. Unfortunately my purty new HP wants to grab every blessed one of them every time it starts talking to my camera. I've banned their relationship for now...they need counseling.)

I'm dying to spend a good chunk of time just gabbing about what interests me - namely my family, of course - but every cotton-pickin time I get on this thing a pop up tells me how important it is to download something or another...and then it usually gives me grief for trying!

Basically, I haven't a clue what I'm doing, but I sure am wasting a good chunk of time doing it! I've been at this thing all weekend long, and I feel more confused than when I started...

BUT!!! This cute little computer actually stays on when I tell it to, so I have hope for our future together.

I'm glad to be back. :)

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Yesterday was emotionally exhausting. I'm always drained by the evening of the 3rd Monday in January.
Martin Luther King, Jr touches my heart.
The entire fight for Civil Rights is a subject I can barely talk about without getting all jumbled up on my insides. I struggle with the weight of the pain and restraint I feel in the fighters.

I want to stand strong with my fists clenched, ready to brawl.
I want to lay down and cover my head.
I want to intercede for the givers and receivers of hurt.
I want to scream and flail and make a fool of myself.
I want to hug everyone...
I don't want to offend, but I want to say I'm sorry.

So many I's. Maybe there needs to be more JESUS in there...

I don't know what to do, but I will keep seeking my part, and let Him have the rest.
Yesterday I packed out my van with kidlets (6 in all) and went to the only MLKJ event I could find in my area. We watched a video and read books and wrote poems and cried. I am so very impressed with my babies for wanting to learn, for wanting to understand.
God be glorified in our attempts.

On to the hum drum:
So, as a family we have been waiting since before Thanksgiving for a $3 an hour raise promised to us by Vicente's boss. "After the first of the year" he said.
The hope of it got us through a *very* difficult 5 weeks with little work, Christmas, and our baby boy's 9th birthday. Through it all we've repeated the mantra, "It's worth sticking it out with this company. It's worth sticking it out..."
Well, on Friday we learned that V's boss has changed his mind. No pay raise.
I won't say much about it because I might self-implode...we have made a few big decisions based on that promise, and it hurts to be lied to...

BUT! On to the fun of it:
We're looking for a new job for my Vicente!
We've considered the Oregon Youth Authority since before leaving Honduras, and it seems that may be where we're being led. It would be just perfect in so many ways. God's will be done!

Quick side note: My little battery icon on the laptop is telling me that it has 100% power!! I haven't a clue as to why it has decided to cooperate, but I ain't complaining! (I believe it has something to do with God knowing how much I can handle...but I won't make any claims.)

Zoo pics!

This was our New Years Eve adventure!
Have you ever been SO cold that you have to keep moving in order to even stay sane? Well, that's how that night was. It was about 7 hours of hopping around and blowing in our hands, but hopefully the kiddos have a couple of cool memories tucked away for a rainy day. :~)
It amazes me how many of the animals were out and about - I don't think I've ever even *seen* the tigers move, LOL! And the cougars and the chimps were down right antsy!
It was a great day all around - though we paid for it all the rest of the week. Both Vicente and I just couldn't get our energy back...
Oh my, is this what getting old is like?!? :~D

Here's our boys with J, a boy I watched all last year:
J and Jeshua. SUCH cuties!
Hoping that the elephant ears would warm us. (Please excuse Evy's corpse-like appearance...)
My E Jo, sweet as ever:
Israel being a dork.
A dinosaur:
An otter:
Da boyz:

Ugh...

FOUR visual migraines in one week.
They hit in the morning, and leave me wasted all day long. I can't even make the most simple of decisions. (Like that sentence. It looks wrong.)
I really dislike whiny posts. I don't feel whiny though, I feel...off. All kinds of out of it, and not a little spacey - and no, it has nothing to do with my hair color!!!
Computer's fading, gotta go! :~)

My heart's familiar ache

It's so much more than a desire.
It's a yearning...a pull...an intense, nonsensical "need".
I am positively UNable to explain this in a way that will even come close to revealing the crave of it.

And it has *always* been a crave:
As a girl, I dreamed of it, happily, for hours on end...
As a teenager, I shaped myself for it, and worked towards making it happen...
As an adult, I've tried to forget it.
All, to no avail.

It actually makes me shaky to try to analyze this feeling - like I'm doing something wrong, just because I Want. Is this what coveting is??
Sometimes I read over my old journals. I sigh for the innocence and wince at the grit, and I usually laugh at the silly promises I've made...
But one thing invariably stops me in my tracks:
My enduring desire for LAND.


Here I am, aching and begging, dreaming and wishing...

I know that there is an infinite amount of more important things to want. And so I choose once again to get used to the hurt, to set it in the corner where it lives, while I focus on what really matters: the PEOPLE of this land.
I ask for their souls to be saved and their lives to be blessed. I pray against their pain and hunger and addiction and disease and indifference.
And more than anything, I ask for GOD to be glorified and JESUS to be lifted up.

In the end, there will be heaven.

Computer woes:

Our laptop is dying! So, unless something semi-miraculous comes up (which it very well just might!), I'm not sure I'll be able to post much here. :~(
And just when I was getting into it! Ah, well. I'm sure God knows what He's doing! :~)